Think positive thoughts, speak positive words by DuckDuckGoose
I understand your frustration. I really do. But, you are not alone. No one has asked you to withstand something unbearable. No one has asked that you do the un-doable. No one has said you must do anything alone.
You are behaving like a brat. You complain that your summer is slipping away and that time is short and money is tight. When my boss calls and asks me to go back to work at 3 weeks post-op you say that'll be great...knowing full well I haven't been cleared to work and that I have a very physically demanding job.
I try to do as much as I can alone rather than ask for help because more often than not you can't be bothered. I have to keep my requests clear and limited to please when you get a chance will you carry this. God forbid you vacuum or do dishes without copping an attitude. If you make dinner then later you complain that nobody would eat if it weren't for you.
When I overdo you use that as proof that I can work or that it's causing you problems because I'm not able to drive or help out as much. I start bleeding and need to go see the doctor and you want me to should drive myself - after all, you didn't overdo, I did. So why should you have to forego your plans to accommodate me.
Everyone tip toes around your bad mood, avoiding you as much as possible, and trying to ignore your tantrums. It is hard on your family and it is hard on me at a time when you knew full well I would need to focus on healing. For years we have fought this nasty endometriosis and made the active decision that this was the time to finally, hopefully, resolve the problem.
I know you are afraid that I'll never go back to work and that this healing hell will go on forever. You're coping with this fear by being a perfectionist, deeply frustrated when things aren't exactly as you expect them.
I need you to relax and try to take things a little more in stride. Think positive thoughts, speak positive words. Be my advocate rather than making me feel like a burden. Ask me how I'm doing and tell me to slow down. When you see me doing too much, ask what you can do to help. Pay attention to me and show love to your family by enjoying the world a little more. We're together and health is at our fingertips.