The importance of offering help by California
Many people, women as well as men (I'm one of them), don't like to ask for help. They suffer sometimes when they shouldn't have to and when their loved ones wouldn't want them to because of the distasteful (humiliating, suggestive of whining/self-preoccupation, recognition/revelation of personal weakness and/or possibilities of complicated indebtness) task of asking for help.
You can help this kind of person by imagining their needs and offering help without their having to ask for it. I pretty much had made up my mind that I wouldn't ask anyone for help during my upcoming hysterectomy (except help from businesses that I would pay for). However, in the course of conducting my affairs I had to mention that I was having this surgery. One person close to me took the initiative to say he would look after me when I came back from the hospital. Though I wouldn't have asked for his help, I gladly accepted it.
Help people by not requiring them to (sometimes uncomfortably) ask for help when it's pretty obvious they can use it. Thanks.