To My Dearest and Best Friend - David

Dearest David -

We are going through a heck of a hard year and I know the toll it has taken on you. We have been through so much together and I know that if we work together as a team we can get through this. I know that I have lost my job twice in one year, gotten sick and have had one surgery already, and now I am bankrupt and we live with my parents. It is difficult, stressful, upsetting and scary. BUT - that does not give you the right to be mean to me, ignore me and stress me out. I did not ask to lose my job, i did not want to go bankrupt or move in with my parents, and I NEVER asked for this horrid disease and the consequences of it. I thought that with the surgery and hormone therapy I have endured since March that this nightmare would be over - but it isnt and I wish it were. You think I am being irresponsible and not caring about us and our future, BUT if I am not well what future would we have? I need you to be with me - hold me - surround me with your love and affection. I am not getting what I need from you and its making this all that much harder. You never take off for my doctor's appointments and you never call to see how it went or if I am okay. I call to tell you the what the appointments outcome is and you say okay and uh-huh. Well you better get on the ball or you can go! I have told you that numerous times, if you dont like what is happening and you dont want to deal with the issues at hand then leave! I cannot worry about our finances or when I am going to go back to work - i need to worry about me and my body and getting healthy to live a long and happy life, with or without you. I guess it boils down to the one thing - I NEED YOU - you are a beautiful man with a heart of gold and I need that right now. I love you with all my heart. You are my soul mate, my best friend, my everything.

I love you - Lori